every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
