too bad you live with your parents still
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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