If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
