We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
3 2 1 whiskey
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
