It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Randomize
