we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
