I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
