I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
