"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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