I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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