definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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