I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
