Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
