If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Randomize
