He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
