I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize