I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
