I should be sponsored by Trojan
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
