"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
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