Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
