is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize