The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Randomize