i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
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