My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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