his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
