do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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