Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
