You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
