I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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