Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
