Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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