What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Randomize
