suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Come see our sink grown plant.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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