Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
