it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
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