She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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