Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I need a beard to bite.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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