The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
His nipple licking is glorious
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