Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Randomize
