I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
