Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
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