hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
