Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
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