his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize
