I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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