this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
