Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
