My underwear smells like fireworks.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
