Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Randomize
