I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
